Mirrors are interesting things. I’ve always thought of a mirror as a way to see yourself. But when you think about it, you’re not really seeing yourself. You’re seeing the reflection of yourself. If you can’t tell, this is going to get deep, y’all. Get ready. I’m philosophy-ing.
I’ve had a problem with self-image my entire life. I can’t remember the last time I looked in the mirror and was “happy” with what I saw. I’m not necessarily unhappy either. I’m not one of those people who is interested in drastically altering my appearance by way of surgery or dramatic means. But I’ve always seen a need for improvement. I’m not looking for compliments here, I’m simply blogging to hear myself blog.
When I look in the mirror, I see myself. But am I really seeing myself for what I am? If you’ve seen those self-esteem television shows or read any of the articles that are supposed to help you with your self-esteem, I’m sure you’ve heard talk of the image that you have in your head versus the image that everyone else sees. How is it that our minds can do such tricks to change the way we see ourselves? Wouldn’t you think that when we look in the mirror we are seeing what is actually there? Not what our brain wants us to see?
Have you ever gone into a fitting room and thought “okay, why do they have skinny mirrors?” It’s almost like a fun-house going into some store’s dressing rooms. It’s a gimmick that totally works until you catch onto their scheme. They manipulate mirrors to make you look skinnier, which in turn, makes you want to buy whatever it is you’re trying on. Then you get home and try it on in front of your own mirror and you’re like “are you kidding me? There’s no way I would ever wear this out in public!” I thought it was all in my head but then I went into a store where you could see that the mirror was angled a certain way to make you look skinnier. Sometimes I wish that you could do that with your brain — angle it the right way so you saw yourself the way you really are, rather than the way your brain wants you to see yourself.
All this being said, and as I said before, I’m not one of those girls who sits in front of the mirror and cries because I’m “not pretty” or “too fat”, etc. I will never hurt myself in that way. I figure, there are enough people out there judging me, I don’t need to judge myself in that way. I always want to give myself the benefit of the doubt. I just sometimes wish that your brain would help you out instead of hinder you. Some days I look in the mirror, feeling great, and think “alright! I can do this” and other days I look in the mirror thinking “What am I thinking?” I guess you live for the days that you feel great and survive the days that you don’t.
I guess this whole blog is to say – you’re beautiful :-)! Don’t let your brain tell you otherwise. I know I’m beautiful in my own special way. So are you! Take it, Christina!
Until tomorrow, beautiful BFs!